Thursday, 18 May 2017

Persuasive Writing - Being a Kid is Better than Being an Adult! by Jiya, Sandhya and Rachita

W.A.L.T Write persuasive writing
Being a Kid is Better than Being an Adult!
Being a KID is waaaaaay better than being an ADULT!  After you read this, you will be on our side.  These are the reasons why.  Kids don’t have as many responsibilities as adults.  Secondly, they
don’t have to take care of anyone else and finally, kids don’t have to go to work.  Kids have more
freedom.

The first reason is that kids don’t have big responsibilities.  Children don’t have to pay bills.  For example, the internet bill, electricity, water, insurance, rent, mortgage payments and gas.  Adults also have to pay for many expenses such as, money needed to run a car and take care of it, education for their children, after school care or activities and groceries.  Adults lives can be BORING and DIFFICULT.  It can’t be easy at times, having to earn and pay for everything!  How stressful!  Meanwhile, children just get to enjoy the things that their parents  provide for them, what a GREAT life!   ( Rachita )

The second reason is that children don’t have to take care of anyone else.  Adults have to take of their children.  It could be VERY , VERY BORING!  They have to wake their children, get them ready, send them to school and pick up them up . All while they organise themselves as well.  OMG!  That's a lot of work.  Adults have to run around a lot when they do all these things.The parents again have to drop off their kids at after school care and activities.  It would be SO DIFFICULT for adults to sort themselves out. (Jiya )

The third reason is that kids don’t have to go to work.  Adults have to go to work to earn money so they can spend it on their needs.  While kids only have to go to school and at school there will be A LOT of fun activities.  When kids come home from school they get to play whatever they want.  Adults still will be at work or doing something like cooking or cleaning the house.  WOW!  That would be A LOT of work! (Sandhya)

We’re sure that you’re on our side, now that you know our reasons .Now do think that KIDS are better than ADULTS?  Kids don’t have big responsibilities, kids don’t have to take care of anyone else and kids don’t have to go to work.  Be totally happy if you’re a kid!

BY  JIYA ,SANDHYA AND RACHITA

Teacher Comment - Well done girls!  Excellent paragraphing and organising of ideas.  I like how you have emphasised important words by putting them in capitals.  Excellent use of adjectives/emotive language to help state your opinion (eg: Difficult, boring vs happy and great).   NEXT STEP: Use questioning to make your audience think.

Persuasive argument - It is Better to be a Kid than an Adult

It is Better to be a Kid than an Adult 

 I strongly believe that it is better to be a kid than an adult! Children don’t have to worry about money, you don’t have to work and you have more fun! Why would you want to be a boring adult when the life of a kid is SO great!

 My first reason is that children don’t have to worry about money because parents pay for everything. Eg: bills for electricity, the internet and water. They also have to buy food, clothes, pay for petrol, a car, try to buy a house or pay rent and for holidays. How horrible! Parents must get so stressed out from having so many responsibilities. They would have to work so hard and be so organised to make sure that everything is paid for. Meanwhile. Children simply get to enjoy life and not worry about such important things.

 Secondly, children don’t have to go to work. Adults may have to type on computers all day long at work. This would be SO tiring. Their eyes would get sore from staring at a screen all day. They may have to work at night. When everyone else is sleeping, they are working hard to earn money. Then they have to sleep during the day while everyone else is having fun and living their lives. Adults may have a job that they don’t like! But they don’t have any option, if they want money, they have to do it. Parents who go to work only get four weeks holiday a year whereas children who go to school get 12 weeks holiday a year. Some adults work over 40 hours a week and become exhausted! Children have a whole 12 weeks holiday a year to relax, rest, play and sleep (if they want to).

 Finally, children have way more fun than adults. Children get to have sleepovers and they get to go to friend's birthday parties. Kids get to play a lot and they go to swimming pools. Whereas adults have to clean, cook, go to Countdown to buy food for the family and do boring paperwork. What a TERRIBLE life! Being a child is full of so much joy. Why would you want to grow up?

In conclusion, we believe that being a child is way better than being an adult. Children have way more fun and freedom, they don’t have to work and they don’t have to worry about money. Being an adult is a nightmare.

 By Mrs Perkins, Ameena and Nidheesh

Teacher Comment: Great use of persuasive language to highlight how awesome it is to be a kid compared to how horrible it is to be an adult. Excellent paragraphing and excellent introduction and conclusion, stating the main reasons.
Next steps: Use questioning to make the reader think. Use research to back up the main ideas.

Thursday, 4 May 2017

Success criteria for writing a persuasive text

WALT: Write a piece of persuasive writing
SC:
Forceful language. Eg:  Let’s act now!   Stop now! 
Make a change!  Stop right there!  Stop littering today!
What are you doing!  Don’t do that!

Questions
Could you live with yourself if you knew you were contributing to the pollution of our planet?
Do you feel the need to ….
What are you doing? Are you truly thinking about your actions?
Do you understand what’s happening?
Do you watch TV? 

Positive or negative words that help to prove your claim
TV is not a good invention – terrible, garbage, trash, harmful, horrible, rubbish
TV is a good invention – great, fascinating, marvellous, amazing, educational, awesome, magnificent, out of this world, fantastic, creative, informative, fabulous, outstanding, mind blowing, brilliant

Paragraphing
Intro (Para 1) – Stating your claim and listing your three main ideas
Para 2 – First main idea and evidence
Para 3 – Second main idea and evidence
Para 4 – Third main idea and evidence
Conclusion (para 5) – Re-state your opinion and sum up your three main ideas.  Forceful language.  Creative ideas for change.  A persuasive sentence.

Use simple, compound and complex sentences
Simple sentences – 1 idea
Compound sentences – 2 ideas joined together using – FANBOYS – for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so
Complex sentences – Ideas joined together that support each other.  Joined together with conjunctions such as: however, although, when, since, before, because, after

Punctuation
! ? , . “ R”